Packed with actionable insights, The Elephant in the Family Room equips enterprise families with the tools to confront silent threats—unspoken resentments, deep-seated insecurities, lingering fears, and misaligned values—that can quietly erode trust and unity. From power struggles to fractured relationships, this book offers a clear path to bridging generational divides and aligning family and business interests.evolve."
Equip your business family with the tools to tackle silent threats—including unspoken resentments, deep-seated insecurities, lingering fears, and misaligned values—that can shatter even the strongest enterprise families.
Business families face challenges that go far beyond the balance sheet. These unseen forces often remain hidden yet profoundly affect the future of both the family and the enterprise. Drawing on decades of experience advising global business families and C-suite executives, René Sonneveld addresses the “elephant in the family room”—the emotional complexities of enterprise families.
Packed with actionable insights, The Elephant in the Family Room provides enterprise families with the tools to confront power struggles, mend fractured relationships, bridge generational divides, and align family and business interests. Each chapter includes real-life case studies and thought-provoking reflection questions to help you apply key concepts to your unique situation. For lawyers, accountants, trust specialists, family officers, and wealth managers, this book provides a deeper understanding of family dynamics, helping you guide clients with greater empathy and effectiveness. Whether you’re leading a family enterprise or advising one, The Elephant in the Family Room is your essential roadmap to lasting success across generations.
A family business is a business whose ownership is controlled by a single family where two or more family members significantly influence the direction of the business through management and governance roles, ownership rights, and family relationships.
To understand the "why" of family business coaching, it is important to understand the ups and downs of the family business.
The human factor can be the business' principal blessing and challenge when family members work in the company. Its success depends on the owner's ability to handle the interplay of family system issues and business system challenges.
The family business may find its strength in a stable ownership group and a long-term and patient perspective. It may have a mission of excellence embedded in ethics and family values and demonstrate solid loyalties and a strong sense of belonging.
"The challenge is to exploit the benefits arising from the family nature of the business while managing the human factor."
On the flip side, there may be competition over resources, power, status, and rewards. Family relationships can be emotionally sensitive. Memories can last long, and there might be concerns about productivity, fairness, decision-making efficiency, and role confusion. The problems in one relationship tend to cross-contaminate the other relationship.
Family business coaching is a positive approach to long-term and sustained leadership development within the family business environment and a valuable complement to creating enduring family governance success. Family business coaching focuses on the family as well as the business.
The family coaching process is a delicate yet rigorous, fact-driven approach that ensures all family members receive proper attention. The process begins with confidential, in-depth interviews, allowing the coach to connect with individuals and understand their perspectives and challenges. By grasping their expectations, values, mission, and vision, the coach builds trust and fosters a creative, collaborative environment. This process helps the coach identify areas of resistance and accountability while ensuring family members feel safe and heard.
The data collection phase is designed to develop a comprehensive understanding of family dynamics while fostering trust among all involved. This process is not meant to be adversarial, but rather an opportunity for everyone to maximize the potential within the family system.
Upon completing data collection, the coach holds a group session with the family to discuss the data from the initial interviews and the learning. The meeting may prompt key questions about what it means to be a high-performing team, how the family wants to experience their family brand, and the necessary components for success, fostering a powerful, transformative family dynamic.
The aim of the family group meeting is to build an inventory of challenges and opportunities for improvement and create a road map for success.
The coaching begins after the initial family meeting, and specific goals are set. Establishing goals is essential for fostering accountability among family members and business executives. The process integrates individual coaching, team sessions, and periodic family group meetings, maximizing alignment and gauging success. Depending on the complexity, participant numbers, and availability, the coaching engagement may span four to twelve months, ensuring a powerful, transformative experience.
René Sonneveld
2022
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